juniberries: (idk if i can do this)
princess "let's get in formation" allura ([personal profile] juniberries) wrote 2018-08-24 04:06 pm (UTC)

[instead, I fell in love.

for the entire wall of text that appears on the screen of her watch, it's that phrase she keeps focusing on. the tail end of a paragraph, but seemingly the center of the entire issue at hand. it's not a shock, not a surprise. he had alluded to this during their fight, but to see it spelled out, simple, straightforward--

it hurts. because deep down she knows she feels the same. knows that what he says is also, in part, the truth, because before his fight with Zarkon she did think him a monster, in a way she thought she had unlearned but simply couldn't.

and in knowing that all this would be easier to take if she kept thinking him as a monster.

but...she doesn't. she's horrified at what he's done, disgusted at the truth, knows full well what she said to him was, in part, a way she knew how to cut him down and hurt him in a way the true nature of his past hurt her. he had been a monster upon hearing what he did. when she confronted him in their room she did see a monster. but--

there's a lot she wants to say, but now she has no response.
]

I do not pity you, Lotor. [I loved you too. perhaps even now I still...] And I do not truly believe you to be a monster.

I apologize; I should have left you alone following our correspondence. Asking Keith to reach out to you was a mistake.

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