inbox | acata

[juniberries]

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"Greetings, this is the inbox of Princess Allura. While I am grateful that you have reached out to me, I unfortunately cannot answer you directly at the moment. But if you leave a message and wait a tick, I will surely get back to you!"

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[juniberries]

[even with a future laid out for them back in their universe, everything here seems to hang with uncertainty. her own feelings, still, remain muddled, despite knowing that she does love him, there ever-remains the hurt of the horror of what he did to their people. and what's to come in the future of their universe does haunt her.

that there exists another person she cares for that she cannot save.

but, here--

the kiss feels right, in a way it shouldn't, and his hands around her, then coming to rest at her waist, also feel comforting in a way she never thought she could feel again beside him. it's a familiarity few others could offer, and while it was her intent to snap him out of his moroseness, she feels no pride, no intent to "beat" him.

her own cheeks are dusted a deep shade of pink, and her hand moves from his neck to once again rest against his face, gazing up at him.]

What we do here is not hopeless. And what you do here matters to me.

[and then, she does pull herself into him for a hug, arms around him, cheek pressed to his chest. even through his armour he feels warm and...she missed this. try as she may have to forget what they once had, she knows she can't.]

[unpatriarchal]

[ she rests herself against him, arms around him in a hug, and lotor stills. at home, she's far more powerful than she is here. but here, she feels so small, and delicate. like a firm touch would do her harm, and while lotor knows that that's not true, he's still cognizant of the fact that he's so much taller than she is, and she fits so neatly into his arms. like he's meant to hold her.

the thought causes an odd twist in his chest. it's grief, he knows, and his breath catches the slightest amount as he allows himself to feel the tiniest amount of it . . . before he catches hold of it, compartmentalizes it, and puts it away, his lips brushing the top of her head in a soft kiss before he sighs into her hair. ]

I have long since learned not to argue with you, Princess. [ and then, a slight pause, before his hand finds her face, and lifts her chin to look at him, his smile soft: ] Well, not argue with you over much. And hopefully over nothing of consequence.

[ he pauses, then, before he dips his head to press his lips gently against hers, the movement soft and light, gentle, in contrast to allura's prior kiss. and he lingers, for the barest moment, before shifting to kiss her forehead, exhaling slowly. ]

You are truly the brightest light in this universe. [ it's murmured, before he pulls away just enough to look at her, eyes searching out hers. ] Regardless of what comes to pass, either here or there, I know that to be the truth. I did not know true happiness, until I met you.

[ and, for the first time in many months, lotor actually does feel a bit . . . lighter, as he says it. some weight has been lifted, though he isn't sure why. but somewhere, inside him, he knows he has something to work toward, now. even if it is vague, and abstract, he could accomplish something. even if it is just making sure allura is not disappointed again. ]

[juniberries]

[her body relaxes into his the longer they remain close, and she too feels her own sense of grief well up in a small pocket in her heart. she doesn't know why; perhaps still reeling from Akvos, or perhaps even further back, to when they broke up, the fight they had. or even further, to the wish he had written and she tucked away. knowing it may never be so, at least not for him in their universe.

so her own expression is soft, eyes glossy and feeling overwhelmed from all the conflicting emotions she's feeling, but through it she manages a small laugh.]

We've done enough arguing. [enough to last a lifetime, it feels.

and before she can think things through, he's bending down to kiss her, a soft contast to hers, and she yields to it, eyes closing, remaining closed as he pulls away and his lips press warm against her forehead.

and she feels. a lot. heart aching at the truth in what he says.

knowing it's the truth. and when she opens her eyes, she finds his searching hers. and she holds his gaze. steadfast, determined.]

I wish you had a happier childhood. [she brings her hand up to rest at the center of his chest, curling her fingers against the plating. it's hard, finding the words to say. it's hard knowing what it is she wants to say.] But...I am...

[a pause.]

A part of who I am, is thanks to you. [without him, she would never have found Oriande. would have never believed her own potential. and he came into her life in a moment where she was at such an impasse, a paladin still uncertain of her role.

it's then that she pulls away, only to take his hand in hers, twining her fingers between his.] And I am truly glad we were finally able to talk.

[unpatriarchal]

[ her fingers in his feel warm, comfortable. easy, like it should be. and he exhales slowly, running a thumb over her knuckles. relaxing into the contact. and he wants to kiss her again, and hold her, but lotor knows that that chapter is long since over.

this is temporary. all of it is temporary. and he wants to talk to allura about that, and explain it, and own it, but . . . ]

My childhood has nothing to do with it, it . . .

[ but he stops himself, there, allows his voice to trail off, and he sighs, inclining his head back toward the temple. toward buildings, and their homes. their temporary abodes, anyway. ]

Can we return to talk inside? Or . . . not talk at all, but I would rather not have someone overhear. Or stumble upon us.

[ he doesn't want to deal with the fallout, so to speak. ]